My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
i have to start hiding my credit card when i drink i woke up this morning with 4 emails from Farmville telling me i spent over $800 on coins last night
just paid a stripper to have a minute conversation about the arizona game WTF
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
she looks like she scalped a horse for her weave
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
Crowning achievement. I bought ranch dressing and emergency contraception.
The highlight of the night was definitely when you starting telling ppl you could shapeshift and "proved" that by stripping.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I know. I know. He'll be weekday dick.
I wear drunk well.
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
Randomize
