i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
maybe we can find two twins tonight and bang them together and then my life is complete
I realize now that I left my pants on that table in the downstairs bathroom at you house on Tuesday....
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Ask her if said friend is decent looking or a wildabeast. Need to know if I need to top these 8 coronas off with a little tequila.
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
Sometimes I think I have so much sex with you to be sure you're actually straight.
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
Look, all I can tell ya is I want to drink wine out of a bottle while you eat me. It would be the most fantastic end to finals week. Maybe ever.
My g-ma saw your dick-pic and wants you to know I've got a keeper. She says her big whopper died in Korea. Good thing g-pa is still asleep.
You can't play that off as role play thing. You held my hips and kept yelling "put a baby in me!" That shit ain't cool.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
Randomize
