Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
but you don't have to sleep on top of four different cum stains because you'd rather buy a case of Franzia than spend $3.50 in the student laundry room
Welp I just blew a load probably the size of a small pond if not a lake
Who the fuck is this
I want to take my head off and cuddle with it
Maybe it will forgive me and stop being an asshole
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
She seriously left me for a guy that likes his own statuses on facebook.....
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
His girlfriends signaled their approval by pulling me off of him and in turn making out with me. I think I will hang out with this group more often
Is it bad that I recognize every dick in your dic pic collection?
Chasing my kid around a 30' jungle gym was not how I envisioned spending the day off work to recover from a vasectomy.
We were in a bathroom while 4 dudes compared dick piercings.
Buffalowww
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
He sent me a picture of his cock that seemed to indicate that we were still on good terms.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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