In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
Drinking mikes hard & watching the swan princess. i fucking LOVE college
I threw up into my coffee this morning.
it is entirely possible that the police will be knocking on the door in 25 minutes
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
There are so many Jimmy John's employees here
Where are you?
Jimmy John's.
I sent him a picture of my boobs instead of saying good morning. I'm trying to tell him how I feel in a language he'll understand.
Hopefully my orange shoes will distract people's attention from my crippling awkwardness
just because the DWI class is located at the University does not make him a professor. I was duped, he is in no way, shape or form a professor!
Well I think won that argument, as the cops were leaving, they offered me a ride to the airport
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
And it's settled. 10 months is the appropriate amount of time before having the dick pic discussion.
I love you even if you are fucked up. If you fall, i'll just get on top of you.
Randomize
