Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
my grandma was just praying before dinner, and before she could finish my gpa lifted his glass and said 'and here's to avatar!'
i remember too much of last night for it to have been successful
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
By this time tomorrow I expect us to be sitting at the kitchen table either playing a drinking game, or crying. Set an alarm
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I didn't ride the struggle bus so much as drive it backwards off a cliff.
Drinking vodka straight out of a beer bottle because I don't want to be judged. Not my best idea and not my worst.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
If I never see my landlord's dick again, it'll be too soon.
I need five more minutes of sobbing.. AND THEN I will get back to studying
I dont have to work tomorrow im yelling gibberish at squirrels
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
STOP IT RIGHT NOW IM BEING A SINLESS CHILD OF GOD IN BED TRYING TO SLEEP AND YOURE SENDING ME MEMES ABOUT DICKS
Do NOT. I repeat. DO NOT call me little one after we have fucked. In no world is that ok. Even jesus agrees.
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