i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I had a dream about a turtle sitting on top of a horse skull. I'm certain its a symbol for my dead sex life. Trust me.
He added me on Facebook. I'm pretty sure he got my name from the inside of the bra I had lost in the frat house.
WHY ARE THERE NO BLACK EMOJIS? I CAN NEVER PROPERLY IDENTIFY MYSELF.
She thinks I'm afraid I'm gonna get caught in one of my lies and some of the girls I'm fucking will find out about each other. But it would be a relief to offload a few from the old crop and work in a few newbies into the rotation. The organization could use some new blood.
Just opened up the freezer to find chocolate penis popsicles. Too hungover for this shit
I know he's gay. But if he touches my vagina I'm human centipeding his face. Sorry not sorry
OMG I WAS JUST THINKING ABOUT HOW OUR FRIENDSHIP IS SO REAL BECAUSE I SHOW YOU DICK PICS AND WE LAUGH TOGETHER.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I still have to bake cookies and shave my legs so Mike can have MILF & cookies when he gets home.
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
I party with great urgency now.
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