To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
I don't care how old I am, if it's your 21st birthday I'm going to make out with you.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
Jail wasn't bad. Was poppin Xanax the whole way there
It's hard to take you serious when you're crying your eyes out wearing an adult sized onesie.
One of my life goals was never to see an uncircumcised dick. I guess that's out the window now.
Have you seen that new toaster that burns your pics to toast? Let's drink some booze and discuss what I have I mind.
We cuddled after till the morning. Then he woke up sober... and straight.
He's nice to look at and knows the difference between your and you're. I win.
Randomize
