is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
People are handing out olympic condoms downtown, just put it on and it broke, this is how there trying to raise the population. Very sneaky canadian government, very sneaky
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
Roomie questionaires don't ask any of the important questions like "how do you feel about one night stands" and "will you judge me post-walk of shame"
I feel so bad for your roommate
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
I think I got a sinus infection from puking out my nose on st. Patricks day #thisis26
Last night at a party someone grabbed my ass so I just fucking punched them in the face then went home and ate a frozen pizza
I took a vibrator for a weekend with my parents instead of a boyfriend. I obviously have my life together.
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
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