So...it's hour 4 of day 5 of week 7 of my internship, and so far all ive done is shred paper. all. day. long. it's like working for Enron.
Just watched a drug bust from the Ralphs parking lot while listening to Frank Sinatra. Happy Valentine's Day.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Ice cream after masturbating>masturbating any other time
I hope we all get so wasted that we ride the cows again
if the future wants me to fuck him, then i guss i have to
I'm going to practice throwing things up the the air and catching them between my boobs, because that seems like a cool party trick.
I feel that the drunker I get, the drunker Facebook gets.
Bitch, it's 2 in the afternoon.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
We went to Olive Garden so high we didn't talk and managed to be awkward enough for the waiter to ask if it was our first date
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
I no longer have the means to support both a women and an alcohol addiction
Randomize
