I sk at the spereo and my dad gave me and all access pass
what???
AN ALL ACCESS PASSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS
shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
A sandwich with pizza as the bread. I love you.
YES WITH THE SQUARE KIND OF SLICES
You should have seen her, she looked like a skinny Jabba The Hutt
That literally makes no sense
Exactly
His IQ level must rival that of a comatosed aardvark.
Donating $10 to Sandy victims for every hurricane I drink tomorrow. Buying me alcohol just became a good cause.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
I fucked him on my yoga mat. Then we wake and baked and ate granola. So yes, you could say I found my center.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Shut up. I hate you. We're doing shots tomorrow. Fuck the consequences.
roommates are droppin acid, i really should stop them from staring directly at the light bulb, but their giggles are so enchanting.
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