'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I don't care how bad it tastes, i just put it in my mouth and deal with it
is it really high of me to have brought my own hot sauce to wendys?
Someone just uploaded pictures on facebook of you making out with random girls. I'm telling you because I'm assuming you don't remember anything, but the 236 pictures in the album should give you a good clue.
so exactly how many freshman chicks did i tell to call me "the tripod"?
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Pretty sure I just convinced a drunk guy at the train station that I was from the future
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Im about to smoke a huge bowl. My penis is so happy. Who needs girls.
Will i get arrested If i steal the salvatiion arny guys bell for ringing it to close to my hangover
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
I actually haven't slept with anyone in a while. I think my whore phase is just seasonal.
I've realized that drinking at your apartment alone on a Tuesday probably isn't a good thing.
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