just witnessed a squirrel raping another squirrel. i couldn't look away.
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
she offered me iced tea and went to go change.then her dad came in the door.i thought i was on how to catch a predator.
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
my life has come down to walking through campus and wondering if every guy is the random i made out with saturday
im drunk. people are steering their children away from me. whatever it is that you called for, I assure you that I don't care. have a good night
I'm pretty sure I have a cold now from having sex on the hood of my car in the rain. Worth it? Absolutely.
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
110% paid for our cab with a lap dance
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
Jungle juice turns everything into a pickup line. All I said was "do you play chess" and somehow I got laid.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.
My roommate has a sixth sense about my jerking off and walks in EVERY. SINGLE. TIME.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
Randomize
