Where is the hickey?
Well if yoir are still awake and secided to drink... You may aswell drink
That text needs to switch to water.
I stood up and a chip flew out of my shirt and landed in the chip dish. I just walked away.
Just once id like a girl to say to me in the dracula voice, i want...to suck...your dick...
ugh the "ive seen you naked on the internet" look is really getting tiring
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
I lost my phone so I put sticky notes all over my roommates body asking her to wake me up at 7:00 AM.
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
The next time we go out, we're bringing a jar so that people can contribute to the rest of what I need to come up with for my breast implants... We'll show them yours for inspiration and persuasion.
I fucked R2D2 last night. I consider Star Wars day a success.
Why exactly is there a butt plug on the counter?
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
Randomize
