I wish i could convert my hornyness to productiveness. I would have written a fucking book by now.
So he ended up having sex with me, but it was so awkward. When it was over, he went to the bathroom, and he came back and asked, "are you on your period or something? there's blood on my dick..." and i said, "well it was supposed to start today, nice surprise...i am so embarrassed." and he said ,"it's better than you queefing." and as soon as he said that, i queef the hardest and loudest i ever had.
this is the 21st century. you drunk fuck him and then go on a date.
all she had left on were here heels. phone five
Ya, because touching his brother's face for 20 minutes in front of him wasn't bad enough, I also threw up in his garden and stole like 10 of his shirts before I left. But I fed his dog, so it's okay.
Also I spent like 2 hours on the hubble/nasa website sunday night looking at pictures of outer space and cried my face off at how beautiful and complex it is. What's wrong with me?!
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Soo I woke up in the storage room at best western....I dont even know what say
like when you break up with someone your virginity slowly starts to grow back & when it's done it's like ding ding ding you're ready to date again
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
The fact that I made out with a twenty one year old father is kind of worrying me now. Like. This is exactly what I wasn't supposed to do in life.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
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