your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
Just thought you should know that we coat checked our fairy wings last night. Getting belly up to the bar was way more important that wearing our costumes.
I'm concerned I'll look like a hooker on new years eve in this outfit
There are different standards on new years eve. To look like a hooker you literally need to be giving a guy head on the street while he's handing you cash.
Every time I drink before 5 somebody's pet dies
Stop drinking before 5
Easier said than done
Just spent the equivalent of my life savings in the liquor store. This is going to be a good weekend
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
That's what he gets for shittin at the strip club. Who does that??
Wife and kids came home early...naked passed out covered in chili cheese Fritos dad will haunt them forever.
Dead. I am actually dead. Also, worst nightmare confirmed: throwing up in a four hundred person lecture.
I know they deliver ice cream, but do you think I can ask the delivery guy to watch the rest of the movie with me too?
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
sad thing: we were only a shot away from an orgy. good thing: we all got laid.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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