winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
She brought up feelings... her days are numbered
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
Well when you're drinking tequila mixed with water out of a steve Austin cup I really don't think acquiring a straw is your main priority
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
If God is analyzing my life right now extremely proud or dissapointed but either way I took wednesday night drinkin to new levels
If they start to date again I refuse to help her sext him. Helping my mom sext my dad is where I draw the line.
I BLEED THE BLOOD OF MY ANCESTORS WHO FOUGHT SO BRAVELY FOR MY FREEDOM
cool u want pads or tampons
tampons please
Randomize
