Um, I don't know who U MEANT to send that to, but yes I WAS going to fuck you. Instead you can go play Halo with ur friends.
He was so confused why there was a string hanging out of my vagina.
that's why i date skinny girls, they don't realize how small it is.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
i feel like i am carryihg a baby. a baby made of alcohol.
I've wasted nicer days than this hungover and dry heaving in bed.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I have accepted that I am a sexual predator. What I can't accept is the lack of sexual men for me to seduce in this town.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Take a shit and have a hit. It's the Sunday Funday Rule.
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
Randomize
