So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
After we had sex he bought me grape soda. I think I'll keep him.
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
Just found out drinking 6 trays of random shots makes me wake up on a club toilet with my underwear and jeans around my ankles
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Some drunk guy thought my knee scooter was the sexiest thing he's ever seen. He then proceeded to ask me about duck hunting and decoys...
Still dying that you shit outside
So you're on like a list there now..."Do not under any circumstances give this person a knife. Serve them in plastic cups ONLY"
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
I feel like a pile of chihuahua shit that got eaten by a Great Dane who puked it up and then set it on fire.
Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
I may be a complete scumbag but even im not willing to spend a grand and sit on a plane for 24 hours just for shrooms and a blowjob
You literally brought me back to life and then fucked it out of me
Randomize
