I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
How do I say "sorry I gave you and your sister herpes" in German?
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
Define 'illegal'. Your idea of it and my idea are in separate universes.
You guys crashed sarahs vespa into a snowbank and its still there. not cool.
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
All I vaguely remember from last night is getting up on that nice mahogany table and debating about squirrel's rights
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
I have lots of feelings today, but drunk is my favorite.
But I'm a half a mile from my bed. And I have the hiccups. I hate hiccups.
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
Just had a threesome with my best friend and LSAT teacher...just checked three things off my bucket list in one night
Btw, you owe me. One (1) orgasm.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
Randomize
