Classy? Dude, she fucked 3 guys as part of a scavenger hunt
And?
be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
talking dirty on facebook chat is the new phone sex.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I wish my dick could take responsibilities for his own actions
You woke up in the middle of the night and told me we won the sweepstakes, the penis sweepstakes.
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
There was a stripper pole on the party bus. Was being past tense because some fat chick somehow tore it from the ceiling while grinding
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I found a half-finished mass text from my California weekend that said "things I want to rape: you, things, stuff, and le"
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
I remember grabbing your ass. So firm. So right. I don't regret it.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
Randomize
