It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
Just tell your wife to stay in the car because you are self conscious about drinking infront of her. Now you have a DD AND we can still have a good time.
Too many sundays start with me waking up still drunk in my car.
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
He was the only guy who ever made me cry..
Who, the park ranger who made you dump out your beer on the beach?
All I remember is passing out with an umbrella over my head and waking up screaming bad luck for seven years
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
Anyway. I unfriended all of these people like a grown up and I am never talking to them again
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
the moment when you open a dick pic with your mom in the car... On your moms phone... Of your dad... Scarred for life
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
