break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
Just went to my life planning class. The professor has a braid going halfway down his back and an earring.
I legitimately woke up with a girl trying to snort cocaine off my dick.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
She just tried to snort granola up her nose but its ok she's not bleeding.
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
just threw up what i'm pretty sure look like contents of a lava lamp
i'm not even sure i have knees anymore. that awesome.
The sun is gonna brush it's hairy dick across my forehead in the morning, gently whispering: "you're 4 hours late for work"
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
Instead of a fine and a few hours in jail he chose to get tasered, break his neck and shit his pants
Randomize
