quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Ohh the wonderful, yet disgusting things she can do with her hair
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I woke up covered in BBQ sauce. My hand had "you win" written on it. Do I celebrate?
the dude from the bar called to tell his mom about me immediately after we finished PLEASE COME GET ME
He wouldnt stop screaming that he wanted a trashcan WITH a lid. Whats so necassary about a lid
asked the cab driver where he learned Swahili last night.
Asking him not to sleep with other girls is like asking me not to have my period apparently
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
He told me that if I were a guy he'd go gay for me. Honestly don't know how to take that.
HEY. NO. THIS IS ABOUT YOU RIGHT NOW. YOUR COCK, MY MOUTH, THATS IT.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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