oh god the rape fog is back!
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
No, dude. Even Jesus hates Creed.
Got one of only two perfect scores in the class on the quiz I took drunk. This is not a good thing for me to have learned about myself.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
I think I just agreed to be an escort for an Asian guy who's gonna be in the city next weekend before he moves back to Shanghai...
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Haha yeah that's basically it. He was like "i've always had a thing for you, and even sober i still would do and feel the same way." so glad to know i am worthy of a sober hookup as well.
I know you're asleep, but I just had a motherfucking epiphany.
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
It was one of those "how did I get to my bed and what am I wearing" mornings.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Well, I can now cross "dirty drunk homeless hobo" off of my bucket list of people who have been successful wingmen for me. North Carolina is getting weird.
and then she asked if she could shave my junk
and howd that go?
can you pick me up from the hospital?
Randomize
