Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
that drag queen yelled at him and touched me to make him jealous and said things like this is what a real man feels like. it was a thrill.
i cant believe i hit a parked car with a pink dildo in my mouth... fuckin epic
They have a pepper shaker for pot.
I like your house better though. Cause it has febreeze and lube.
I don't think you have any idea how kinky that sounds.
it's my sixth sense. If there's an orgy within 20 miles of me i'll know about if. Or be a part of it.
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
How many fucks given?
0.12846
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
She is carving a little coffin out of some wood for her hamster that died. I'm flying home tonight.
You ate ashes out of my bong
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Randomize
