If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
I go to guys houses late at night, have a little fun, come back by dawn having made their life a little bit better. I am the official blow job fairy.
You stole her bday cake and shared it with drunk strangers on the street.
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
I was high fiving everyone. I even high fived with the wall for doing such a good job suporting the ceiling and keeping us alive.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Why on earth is he slamming his body into the wall again?
All you have to do is speak. Your voice reverberates strait to my vagina.
You're wonderful. How are you always such a good friend?
50% genetics, 50% driven by a desire for people to drunkenly eat donuts at my funeral and then have fantastic cry-sex afterward.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Success! We fucked roommates!
Go shave, and then go fuck the man
YOU ARE SO CRUDE, I LOVE YOU
Randomize
