i just remebered that we smoked out my hamster yesterday...
i hope hes still alive. i just remember you give him a shit load of cereal and saying "trust me your going to need it"
I have to keep checking she's breathing. This is why we don't drink on Sundays
his apartment was in a funeral home, walk of shamed through a visiation in the skankiest outfit i own
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
Omg I'm puking right now and then sneezed four times in a row. You don't know pain til this happens to you.
You come home the day the world is supposed to end. Well played Mayans.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Sometimes I get in situations where I realize they think I'm smarter than I am and then it's just one more thing I have to fake.
I'm about to be a big disappointment.
He fucked me so hard my nail polish actually chipped. I'm keeping him.
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
I'm in my onesie attempting to spoon-feed myself cold soup. I'm playing freeze tag with my hangover. My hangover's winning.
Tequila should only be paired with the finest of dick
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