The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
can we take a shower together?
no need for the romantic shit. I'm a sure thing
I woke up face down on my laptop with three windows open: itunes, chat roulette and redtube
his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.
I wish I could just thrust my cock straight into her new relationship.
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
This is your morning news. Today at 5 pm I will be going out of town until the 29th. If you would like some great sex before I leave, please contact me. The available packages are: a house call, an outdoor excursion, or a delivery style in-car quickie. available only while supplies last.
Our logic class started an hour ago, I walked out and found my sister drunk, sitting down, eating m&ms, afraid to walk in... I want her life
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
I inadvertently smoked 6 blunts at one time. We just kept passing them around...I didn't know what happened until it was over. I can't walk.
I am not working on the very first day I can throw up alcohol that I legally bought and drank.
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
This strip club is mediocre. Talent is fine. Fung shui is bad.
I want you to defile me in my childhood bed.
I just tried to dye my pubic hair teal for her
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