He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
All of my current injuries can be related back to sex.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Bring single women, or taken women who are unhappy with their relationships, or women who are happy with their relationships but have low moral standards, or women who just like to remove clothing when drunk (relationship status is unimportant for this option)
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
View of Vancouver Bay is obscured though the greasy hand prints from fucking against the window. Tip maid well.
I'm running on 2 hours of sleep. Just spent 6 minutes staring at the back of my hand thinking: "I don't really know this that well"
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
Our Tuesday night drunk Irish step dancing was on point tonight.
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
Randomize
