Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
Time to put an end to this 'unprotected sex with crazy girls who have violent exes' trip I've been on so far this summer
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Confidence margaritas not a good idea. Just said foreskin in my presentation instead of foresight.
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Nope she woke up in a hotel room alone on 55th street. A guy in a lamborgini gave her a ride this morning. She was walking barefoot home
Im so tired of dysfunctional exs fucking up my relationships with future dysfunctional exs
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I'm pretty sure when you walk down Broadway and can pick out people you've slept with.. It might be a problem. I'm leaving for rehab tomorrow.
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Someone's shaving their pubes at work every Monday and it's starting to piss me off
I mean come on
we all thought you were asleep. he found you an hour later sitting outside in the snow lighting a bowl, singing the CatDog theme song, and hugging a box a Franzia.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
I'm like a camel in the desert in a black hole I'm so thirsty.
Randomize