My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
theres a kid face down in the middle of campus... people are going about their day and paying no attention to him
I can't look at him without thinking about his cum face
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
i dont know how he's 22 and thinks emoticons will get him laid. lady boner just died.
Because everyone is allowed one half drunken 7:30 am walk back to campus in a cowgirl costume, right?
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
My mom comes home from her weekend with her lesbian co-workers and asks "You wanna know how I got these bruises?" I've never been more torn about anything EVER.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
I woke up with a hangover and a man bun. Reached over to drink water and accidentally chugged raspberry vodka. So there's that.
The body is still out there. I don't think my trainer realized when he asked me not to drink for 24 days, how often I see dead people
if he becomes president of the united states, I will tell EVERYONE that i took his virginity.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
Randomize