even my worst enemy doesn't deserve a bush like that
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
True life I used my fake as a photo id for my final. My professor told me good luck and laughed. Hope the bouncers are in the St. Patrick's day spirit.
four loko is officially banned. leave it to the kids from a state school to fuck it up for everyone
Since your rent is paid til the first, we decided to use your apartment as the beer pong room. We apologize in advance for losing your security deposit.
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
This old guy just saw me toking on my bubbler before I go to the dentist. He gave me the nod.
The TA leading my study session just said "now get outta here. I need to get drunk before class"
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Im gonna wear a random assortment of things for Halloween, guy with the most creative answer gets laid
Tell the cops to let you through! Tell them you need to do drugs!
You have better ratings than Crest. Only 4/5 dentists recommend it. You have 8/9 recommendation for your blowjob skills.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
you know maybe it wouldnt be so bad if it hadnt happened before. At least I didnt blow him this time
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
Randomize
