I wouldn't necessarily call it an addiction, more of a passion. I'm habitually passionate.
Any particular reason you put 2 smashed up limes in my back pocket last night?
just graduated on the spot on the quad where I vommed freshman year. full circle
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
I locked the porch door but I left a spare key on top of the keg on the side of the house
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
JOY: That feeling when you crack open a handle for the first time, and the flow limiter comes off with the cap.
Fun fact. I am at the police dept. getting served a warrant for unpaid ordinance... and the officer was a one night stand from like 10 years ago.
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
Pulled over to puke on the way to sign closing papers on the house...Good sign of responsibility.
I found the crust to my pizza under my covers that's cool
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
There are only a few things more freaky than wandering around a zoo drunk.
She fucked a bartender in a closed Applebee’s and has the nerve to call me easy
Randomize
