Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
she looked like the before picture.
what do 4 police cars, 1 ambulence, and 2 fire truycks have in common?.... My driveway
17 year olds will be the death of me.
You kept referring to your penis as "this guy."
I JUST SHOOK HIS GRANDMOTHER'S HAND. WITH COCK HANDS. THIS IS NOT FUNNY.
I woke up covered in blue paint and my knee bleeding, when I went to return the shopping cart the guy in the elevator laughed hysterically. I'm having a good morning.
We left the bar, went to a sex shop, bought penis shotglasses, went back to the bar and insisted that the bartender used them.
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
I immediately regret the tequila decision.
I'm going to be drunk and braless all weekend. Let the festivities begin!
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
Dude someone puked in a bowl n put it in the fridge. I thought it was salsa! Who does that?
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