if you don't open the door right now liz is going to get pregnant
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
the caf people were giving us weird looks and she yelled ITS A LIFE STYLE
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
The dentist walked in on me trying to bottle some laughing gas to take home with me. That high.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
So i dislocated my knee but still went home and fucked his brains out. Nothing gets in the way of my sex life. NOTHING.
Try sleeping with him.
Why is it that all my gay friends have that solution...
Cuz you will have an answer or have sex.
Randomize
