Instead of peeing my cute lil blue panties I peed in the train parking lot in front of an asian.
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
Its way too early to be sitting naked at his dining room table...
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Exactly. All of us sinners go to hell and get nothing while all of the goody two shoes get to go to heaven where its all pink floyd, lasers, and pot.
never thought i'd see a ''climb of shame'' until she came down from the attic in front of the whole party..
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
Im going to bed. I'm seeing 7 of everything and my world smells like gravy
So the guy I hooked up with during welcome week just tried to booty call me from across the lecture hall at 9am. I don't think he gets how this works...
I think girls have an advantage in chugging contests. We know how to just open our throats.
Just saw the ex while I was at CVS at 3am buying Depends for my heavy flow
Getting drunk at 9 am is not a super power.
Yeah, oh and the story gets better. His friend was dressed as a christmas tree wrapped in twinkle lights and had to plug himself in the wall all night.
She's got a shotglass necklace, running down the street asking people to "fill her up". Get here.
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