still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
when i woke up this morning i blew my nose and ash came out.. i'm not sure what to make of this.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
She's dressed as a slutty Dalmatian. I doubt she has morals.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
And then I asked the bartender for my third shot and he told me he had to cut me off at two because this was in fact a family fun center
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon�
Just did a "spirit of homecoming" bump off a stranger's credit card. A stranger that dropped us off at home. Erica's bad. How do allllll of the Eastern Europeans know how to find drugs so easily?!?
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Or I could hide in your trunk so you can sneak out of putt putt for sex breaks
His boxer smelled like clean laundry while I was giving him head. It was delightful, like sucking a dick in a spring meadow.
Legit sprained my cooter. No joke. Icing her down as we speak.
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