yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
gail simmons from food & wine magazine just heard me order my plan b pill
did you ask her what wine to pair it with?
New pre-game routine....wal-mart bathrooms...quality beers for free...hallelujah
had to ask my 13 year old sister if she knew any dealers... she did. it's good to be home.
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
So I've been to the library twice so far. Both times were for the atm, and once I was stoned. Junior year is going great.
The fish's death was accidental. We all said a few words at his funeral. Roomie wanted to play only the good die young as he swirled down the toilet bowl
no more duck duck goose at the bar
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
Hey, next time you have sex, flick his balls, and tell him "thats for getting spit in jennifer's eye and laughing about it."
Well there is another shower in Nov. So I have three months to figure out how to get some drunk space fucking. May need some of your mead
What did he say?
NOTHING. GODDAMN HIM AND HIS MAGICAL PENIS!
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
The appetizer at the dinner I went to tonight was Klonopin and a Bloody Mary.
Only real friends lend their restraints to engagedfriends to fool around with married strangers.
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