no it's cool...i'm just drinking and studying...cool night
i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
Turns out getting tied up to two door handles and forced to repeatedly cum is actually a really good ab workout.
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
It's like being the highest you've ever been, then doing about 20 shots, and chasing them with lines of coke. All while laying on the surface of the sun.
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
Of course not. I'd be offended if you didn't bring my boobs into casual conversation.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
He totally sucks at sexting. He sent me a clothed shot of his ass captioned "I know this gets you going." What?
LIKE ALL I WANT TO CURE MY HANGOVER IS PORKROLL AND LIKE 85% OF THIS COUNTRY DOESN'T KNOW WHAT IT IS
Finally fucked my buddy's mom!! We are both ten years older and for her it really shows but i hit it!!
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