The walk of shame is so much worse when you've spent the night third wheeling.
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
girls mom is dying from cancer and she msgs me for a booty call. I guess people cope with their situations differently.
still haven't packed clothes. only wine. gotta love spring break
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
What is the appropriate way to inform him that I am TOTALLY down for break up sex?
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
Again??? Now we can't ever fucking go there again STOP PEEING IN FOYERS
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
went back to my college bar last night. Bar tender doesn't remember my name but remembers me as margarita girl...I'm not even mad though
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Hope you are okay. You were running down the street with shopping cart at one point and yelling "bitches aint shit!"
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