I can no longer count the number of girls I've banged on my fingers and toes. It's like being born again.
I just sneezed and it tasted like taco bell.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
Someone else needs to become the bad example in our group
But you wear shame so well
I don't give a damn about what he wants to do with his life. Personalities are for pussies.
She pushed me over. She offered me a shot from her tits. We're good now
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
woke up and somehow me leather belt got torn in half. either we partied with the hulk or some chick just could not wait to see my dick. probably the former tho
Can we just get drunk and watch the Birdcage please I have no tolerance for straight men today
I would go disguised as someone he didn't have premature ejaculative sex with but I don't know if I could stay in character.
I should probably add her on Facebook for as much as I cheat off her in Physics, huh?
Those brownies did us in. I honestly blacked out completely.
What brownies? Ohmygod.
Randomize
