Well apparently he's into motor boating.
i guess you could say your face is two degrees of separation from my balls
The chance that I have herpes may have made me find god
Have you ever seen an entire lecture hall fist pump? It's magical.
I bet they don't have a scenario slide on how to deal with a suggested three way with counsel during harassment training.
It feels wrong to have dick mouth at a family dinner.
I just found what appears to be a tooth in my purse...anybody missing one?
I would compare it to a jeffrey but in smoothie form. More drugs in here than Bobby Brown's sock drawer.
he fell asleep like an hour after we got to the beach, he deserved that penis shaped sunburn.
Cut a hole in the crotch of my onesie so we could have sex without me getting cold. Best decision of my life.
There is a midget driving a powered tricycle around town. I am not drunk, stoned, or lying.
do you think the dildo I'm bringing through airport security is considered a weapon?
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
He came back with a Butterfinger and vibrator batteries. There's no refusing him now.
They gave me 4 meds at the health center and said not to take alcohol with any of them. Guess ill wait until tomorrow to feel better.
Randomize
