Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
Apparently I gave him a 'Steve jobs blowjob'
I fed him jelly beans while he fingered me. Win, win situation.
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
Oh, I never thought you were a dick. You were one of the best morally comprised ideas I've ever had.
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
Last night when you stole the construction sign you told me to tell you that first you did it for the money Than you did it for the music But mostly you did it for your family
Thanks for fucking me in last night
TUCKING. TUCKING ME IN LAST NIGHT
He invites me over too FucK and i wind up eating 6 jimboys tacos with his roommates. While he waited in his room. Maybe next time
Sincerely. Thanks. You could have thought of anyone sitting on your face but you chose me. :)
Is it against health code to come into work half drunk and commando?
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
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