You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
You couldn't hold yourhead up but you managed to unzip my zipper. That's skill..
I've developed breathing exercises to keep myself from puking..
Um....sorry for hooking up with your brother last night...
Actually i take that back. You dropped the whiskey last night and broke the bottle. Were even
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
It's twenty thirteen and the rando and I bonded over the fact that we're both stil using flip phones. Of course I fucked him in the bathroom. It was the obvious thing to do.
I gave you the craziest sex experiences of your life, the least you could do is let me keep the sweater.
He said it wasn't ladylike of me to drink more whiskey than him. I told him to stop being a little bitch.
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I woke up in the bathroom clutching a stuffed shark. My night was fantastic, thanks for asking.
Who's phone is in my pants and why did I wake up clutching a handle of vlad?
You are not allowed to sing ever again, my ears are still ringing.
Look fucker, my sensibility and attention to detail is the ONLY REASON you're not dead now
Randomize
