so let's talk penis.
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
you only had a canadian ten, but you said it was all good cuz you would just by molson.
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
Looks like a significant portion of my drinking money just became legal fees.
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
Driving to get a preg test with my ex, wearing my unicorn hat
You are so not ready for motherhood
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
I feel like I should have backed off when "I love you" came out on the third date. Now I'm in her bed wondering which door my shrine is behind. Fuck.
I've been called an asshole for a lot of things in my life, but I never thought it would be because of potatoes
If blow jobs were a super power she'd be in the Justice League.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I'm too high and old for this...
Randomize
