Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
We're starting "No Hesitation Fridays." The probability of this going horribly are between 100 to 125 percent
He tried peeing out of the sunroof.
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I am getting drunk. And i'm going to paint my face and slide down the stairs like Pochahontas. Goodbye
PSA: Morning booty calls are no longer accepted after the hours of 6am when I've been drinking or before 11am when I have not. Your cooperation is appreciated.
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
No. Way more drunk than the night I put a snowball in my purse "for later" and woke up to find everything soaking the next day.
But less drunk than the day that Pete took four of your birth control pills thinking they were Advil, right?
Can I just lay in bed and you pour vodka through a funnel in my mouth?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
We were high and the scary movies were scaring us too bad. Were all watching porn instead now
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
