the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
I wonder if all of the nights I blacked out will be revealed to me when I die. Have you ever thought about that?
Kanye's agent is the only person whose job sucks worse than mine.
I don't know what happened last night but I woke up this morning with "wolf pack" tattooed on my knuckles.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
did i really just refer to you as "the mid season replacement"
I can'nr wwn explain this nihght . So amnt dixks. Shitttttt.
The girls we hooked up with were hammered, pushing each other in a shopping cart into the sushi place and through the restaurant... One's a volunteer EMT. God help her patients.
You obviously dont comprehend the level of insane i operate at
I've had balls on my face twice in last 48 hours and I STILL haven't got laid!
You can't spell "party" without "RA."
You know what else you can't spell it without? "Gonna get fired."
he played intl players anthem 4me and ate a strawberry out of my pussy
He'd never survive you. Is there a boot camp for pre-heather training?
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
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