my roommates friend slept in my bed when i was out of town..she ran out screaming cause she saw my VCR
my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Three 40's of Mickeys, is no excuse to be naked at Baskin Robins.
i googled "the goonies drinking game." i may be alone, but i'm living the college dream.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
This text is addressed to sober me: getting drunk by yourself may have seemed like a Good idea at first bit it can tell you that it wasn't ad fun as you thought it would be
Ps your lap top bag is FULL of empty beets
You are not going to get a pat on the back from me for not fucking that 40 year old again.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Waking up drunk is great, waking up drunk and hanging with your mom is even better.
I'm super disappointed in my clit.
He said he loved me more than Kel loves orange soda
the result of growing up in the '90's
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
Im drinking a CAN of bud light at the bar. Do you really think I care anymore?
Randomize
