yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
turns out gay frats are just like normal frats, only with more v-necks
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
I think he'd cut a tree down for me. He's from North Dakota. That's something hot guys do there, right?
It ended with me crying and eating pizza in my closet.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Its 6 am and me and the girl in the next apartment have been taking turns puking and yelling "never agaaaain" thru the walls.
If Dave says he's going to have sex with her, he's going to fuck her retarded and turn her crazy. So run.
The problem with Wednesday evening drinking is that no gets to my level. It's like like a one man party. But it's a goood party.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
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