I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
Note to self: When getting ready to leave with a kid in a wheelchair don't say Let's roll
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
Sometimes I send them texts like "I want to make you cry and lick up your tears" just to fuck with them. And THAT is how you get rid of a Stage 5 clinger.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
You understand the drunkenness of my drunkenness
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
When he saw my tits he said "wow you should be proud.
I'm at an awkward stage of not being able to tell if I wanna keep having fun or if I need to die in bed
after sex he fell asleep with his water bottle in one hand and his dick in the other at 6pm. I'm a winner.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
i feel like every weekend turns into a giant blur of i dont want to know...
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
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